Courtesy of Carly Dendinger
Carly Dendinger
Chances are, when the average person thinks of a Veteran, they think of a man – despite the fact that the largest growing population of Veterans is made up of women.
“Just in Ohio, there over 60,000 female Veterans,” says Carly Dendinger, Dublin resident and Air Force Veteran.
Dendinger is actively working on initiatives that bring services, respect and recognition to women Veterans, and as a member of the Women’s Advisory Committee for the Ohio Department of Veterans Services, she’s surrounded by other women committed to the same cause.
“Sometimes I feel good about myself, and then I met the other women on (the committee) and I’m like, ‘Wow, there are some really accomplished people out there,’” she says, laughing. “They’re phenomenal.”
Alongside a few of those women, Dendinger helped found new nonprofit, the Ohio Women Veterans Foundation.
“(Women Veterans are) an underserved part of the population,” she says. “They are just very hard-charging, fantastic individuals that, for one reason or another, were drawn to serve their country. I think there’s a very unique individual that chooses to do that, especially during the young periods of your life because it’s not easy.”
First drawn to the Air Force ROTC by the financial aid the program provided her while attending the University of Maryland, Dendinger questioned her choice to join a few times throughout college.
“Even through my sophomore year, I’m like, ‘Should I be doing this?’” Dendinger says. “‘Maybe I should transfer.’”
One pivotal conversation during boot camp changed her perspective forever. A field training officer asked Dendinger one night if she was enjoying the training.
“And I said, ‘With all due respect, sir, are you insane?’” Dendinger says. “He said, ‘You know, we’re all getting out of this boot camp and all getting out of life the same way, so enjoy it. Enjoy the moments because you may never be in the same room as these people again. You’ll go through life experiences with people, and if you enjoy them, you may get in more trouble, but you’ll also do better.’”
After that, she says, it was like a switch inside of her flipped.
“Prior to that, I’d almost been fighting it a little bit, but I realized I have some big things to do in this world and I need some discipline and some dedication in order to do that,” she says. “It gave me structure, and I think the structure that ROTC gave me and the opportunities it gave me while in college were so unique and so different.”
After graduating, Dendinger was commissioned as a second lieutenant and relocated from New Jersey to Salt Lake City, where her passion for serving Veterans bloomed.
“Even at that time, we tried to do as much as we could for Veterans,” she says.
Coming to Dublin
After spending a year overseas in Japan, Dendinger returned stateside as a captain in August 2006, and decided to separate from the service. Dendinger and her then-fiancè, Drew, moved to Dayton when he was assigned to the Wright-Patterson Air Force Base. By November that year, they were married.
“That was a huge transition in my life,” she says. “I went from being Captain Koch to Captain Dendinger’s wife, and it was an identity crisis in a lot of ways. I felt lost and didn’t know what to do.”
Dendinger says the transition from being active duty to becoming a Veteran is a tough time for many people who experience it, especially women.
“When I separated (from the military), I didn’t take into account what that would mean,” she says. “Women Veterans don’t always identify as a Veteran. Like I said, I had that identity crisis and I think that happens quite a bit. I’ve been places where my husband will say, ‘I’m a Veteran,’ for a discount or something, and no one bats an eye or gets questioned, but I have.”
To smooth the transition, Dendinger soon enrolled at the Fisher College of Business at The Ohio State University to pursue a Master of Business Administration.
The Dendingers moved to Dublin in 2013 after a few years in the central Ohio area.
“Collectively, Drew and I have lived in a lot of places, and we have visited a lot of places, and we can’t think of a better place to raise kids (than in Dublin),” Dendinger says. “It’s like a movie set. It’s perfect.”
Photo by John Nixon
Not Invisible
While at Fisher, Dendinger says she joined an MBA Veterans group which introduced her to the Ohio Department of Veterans Services (ODVS).
“One of the huge things that the Ohio Department of Veterans Services does every other year is a women’s conference,” she says. “It’s a way for women Veterans to come together in a centralized place.”
The ODVS brings in vendors and speakers and gives female Veterans the space to explore their identity with their peers.
Through the ODVS, Dendinger was also introduced to the I Am Not Invisible campaign, a virtual photo gallery made to highlight what female Veterans look like.
“It’s old, it’s young, it’s Caucasian, it’s Asian, it’s a mixed bag,” says Dendinger. “That was their goal, to highlight beautiful faces from all over the country and really show these are our Veterans also.”
At first, Dendinger was hesitant to participate and have her portrait taken, but ultimately decided it was worth it.
“It’s for when my kids get older, to have these kinds of experiences where I can show them the picture and explain why, what the purpose was and why it’s important to shine a spotlight on people,” says Dendinger.
Out of all the life lessons she learned during her time with the military and as a Veteran, Dendinger says one lesson stands out above the rest.
“One thing that the military did for me and taught me that I try to instill in my children too is you have to be comfortable being uncomfortable,” she says. “Putting yourself in situations that are different, or foreign. For me, that’s been where the most growth has come.”
Sarah Robinson is a contributing writer. Feedback welcome at feedback@cityscenemediagroup.com.
